(With apologies to Julie Andrews)

Porridge for breakfast, and South Melbourne Market,
Brown Yarra River, and shopping at Target,
Gold leaves of autumn dissolving in rain --
These are the signs I'm in Melbourne again.

Brunches in cafes, and movies in "foreign",
Buskers with bagpipes, complete with a sporran,
All Nigel's woes while commuting by train --
These are the signs I'm in Melbourne again.

Scones from the baker's, and all kinds of cheeses,
Huddling in blankets while outside it freezes.
Hip little places down every small lane --
These are the signs I'm in Melbourne again.

When my eyes glaze,
When I've brain pain,
When I'm feeling sad --
I simply recall I'm in Melbourne again
And then I don't feeeeeeeeeel so bad.