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Hell is the Pakenham Line?

by nigel on 16-Apr-2011
This week was my first complete week of commuting by train from Flinders Street in Central Melbourne to Dandenong on the Pakenham Line.

I had done one day two weeks previously and two days one week previously so I had a clue that all did not necessarily run smoothly on this particular spoke of the Melbourne urban railway network.

Over the last few years I have travelled a couple of other routes so I feel I can make valid comparisons.

I remember one evening, and I am sure it was a Friday, the sun had set as I stood on the platform of Albion station waiting. The train I intended to catch had been cancelled, but an "express" and a regional train passed through at speed.
Next to the station stands what was, I think, an old flour mill. At some time in the past the railway delivered raw materials and collected processed goods from the two sidings that now sit behind the high fence that isolates the yard.
A modern day inter-state freight passed by on the standard gauge line: three or four locomotives pulling nearly a kilometre length of freight containers into Melbourne to highlight how the role of the railway has changed.
Eventually a stopping train pulled up at the station and about an hour of my evening time had been lost.

In theory I can catch the 7:34 train and arrive at Dandenong with seven minutes before my bus takes off on the next leg. On both Monday and Tuesday the train is precisely seven minutes late so that I can see, from the platform, my bus leaving precisely on time. To add insult to injury the next bus is late both days.
So Wednesday I catch the preceding train, an all stations affair, and have the joy of seeing my train from previous days arrive precisely on time. Fortunately on Thursday the 7:34 is cancelled, justifying my decision to leave the apartment ten minutes earlier.
As to Friday well I catch my 7:24 and maybe the 7:34 arrived on time or not but who cares, I make my bus.

Coming home is as much fun. Firstly is the bus. The 5:38 is reliably within a couple of minutes of 5:38 and the 6:05 is reliably five minutes early.
The trains seem to be a different matter. The timetable kind of leads one to expect the same sequence of trains every evening. But the timetable can probably be filed under fiction.
Basically you stand at the station and wait for something that is going to go your way.
This can be complicated by the stations electronic signage and automated announcements not being up to speed with the highly dynamic environment that is known as "train uncertainty theory".
Thus a train can arrive claiming to be heading for Flinders Street while the station itself insists that it is going the other way.
On Friday everybody is confused when the Flinders Street "up" train is indicated as departing from the "down" platform, but not when. So when a train arrives from Flinders Street it takes a lot of reassurance from the staff to convince people that, yes it is going back the way it came. You can feel the tension in the carriage evaporate when we pull out in the required direction.

To add spice to the evening journey is the possibility that you will have the privilege of riding in "heritage" stock. This is the sort of stuff that usually only still moves because a group of dedicated individuals give up their free time to make it happen. But the Victorian government and the train operator, kindly let you ride it for the standard fare.

You may also have your train pull into a station somewhere in the South-East and be asked to leave the train as it cannot pull out again while you are on it. Indeed it may have difficulty pulling out at all. Eventually it struggles off and the next train arrives and you climb aboard. Your new stead then slowly follows its sick compatriot until it finds a siding to die in and you are home before you can finish War and Peace.

All this in one week, but I consider myself fortunate. I am travelling out from the city when most people are travelling in, and vice versa.
I, at least, always have a seat for my journey.